Select and enter your email address Morning Call Quick and essential guide to domestic and global politics from the New Statesman's politics team. According to legend, if a man goes missing in the swamp, the shoebill is to blame. Little wonder that, in its Tanzanian homeland, the shoebill is seen as a bad omen. Staring into this powerful bird’s beady eye – its extraordinary face more African mask than that of a bird – I felt connected for a moment to something old and original, some Ur-presence that both excited and unsettled me.

On my side, though, the encounter was unforgettable. Here, in captivity, stared at by the likes of me, Prague Zoo’s fine specimen seemed bored and perhaps a little bemused by the attention. I suspect that, once that tedious ritual is over, they’re glad to get back to what they do best. In the wild, they are formidable hunters, taking not only fish but water snakes and even small crocodiles and, though they do keep company sometimes, it is only for as long as it takes to mate. (Although the zoo is said to hold two breeding pairs, we encountered only a single bird.) This may seem odd, because shoebills don’t do much: they tend to stand very still for long periods of time and, natural solitaries, make it all too clear that they feel nothing but disdain for spectators. Yet, while the salamanders were suitably sinister-seeming (one had recently bitten off a keeper’s finger when the presumptuous fellow tried to sex it), it was the shoebill who won our hearts. On my last visit to the Czech capital, some 17 years ago, I had avoided the zoo (a general policy before I had children: the sight of animals in captivity depresses my spirits, even when the zoo is humane and well designed) but the prospect of a giant salamander – supposedly, the inspiration for Karel Capek’s feverish sci-fi classic War with the Newts – and what might well be the most enigmatic of all birds, forced me to set aside my misgivings. Usually, when I visit a city, my first port of call is whatever passes for a botanical garden but when he told me that Prague’s zoo contained not only giant salamanders but also two pairs of shoebills, I could not resist the temptation.

The science is fascinating, but when you get right down to it, this already mean-looking bird with a huge, clattering death bill now also has poop legs.A few days ago, my son, Lucas, and I took the train to Prague for his school break. As with other birds, the poop is mostly liquid, and heat from warm blood passing through the legs is used to evaporate the liquid waste, resulting in cooler blood circulating through the stork. They crap on their own legs because it keeps them cool. (Why would I even be writing these words if not to lull you into a false sense of terror completion?) Are you ready for it? They crap on their legs.

Arabs reportedly called the bird Abu-Markhub, or “father of a slipper” (just can’t get away from that shoe imagery).īy now we must have hit all the things that are scary about the Shoebill, you must be saying. They appear in the artwork of the ancient Egyptians. Shoebills have been a beloved species for a long time. But it’s also impossible not to be impressed by these giants. When there’s nothing but lungfish or crocodile left, the Shoebill will give it a quick decapitation with the sharp edges of the bill (because of course it does) and swallow away. Clamping down on its prey, the bird will start to swing its massive head back and forth, tipping out whatever stuff it doesn’t want to eat. Then the bird will pounce forward, all five feet of it, with its massive bill wide open, engulfing its target along with water, mud, vegetation, and probably any other hapless fish minding their own business. The Shoebill will stand there, motionless as a statue, and wait for some poor lungfish or baby crocodile to swim by. While it poses no real threat to humans (sure…) the Shoebill is actually a pretty terrifying creature, and not just because it looks like a Muppet that was spawned from one of your nightmares. The article begins by asking if there isn’t a better name we could be using for this bird. This, sir, is most definitely a demon.- Chara 💔 Patreon/Onlyfans June 10, 2020Īccording to an article by the Audobon Society titled, “The Shoebill: Or, the Most Terrifying Bird in the World” (seriously, even the freaking Audobon Society thinks this bird is terrifying AF),

Shoebill meme